You are a Bosnian when:
you begin most sentences with “jebi ga” (fuck it).
you can not explain what “bolan” means, but you use it all the time.
your mother insists that “promaha” (draught) will kill you.
older people call you “sine” (son!) although you are a girl.
your mother tells you to wear “podkosulja” (undershirt), no matter what the temperature outside.
you tuck your “podkosulja” into your underwear.
your father refers to all politicians with “djubrad”, “lopovi” (thieves) and “kriminalci” (criminals).
your mother threatens you with “samo cekaj dok ti caca dodje kuci” (just wait till your dad gets home).
you are 6 and your father sends you out to buy him “Drina” and “Sarajevsko” (brands of cigarettes and beer).
you start your day with a cup of coffee and a cigarette
your mother won’t accept the fact that you are not hungry
you have “pita” (Bosnian food that is like a pastry puff filled with salty fillings like cheese, meat or potatoes) for dinner at least 4 days a week.
you have “sarma” (stuffed cabbage) for dinner the remaining 3 days
a loaf of bread is eaten for lunch every day
your neighbor comes over every day uninvited, for coffee
you have 17 consonants and 2 vowels in your last name
your mother tells you not to sit close to TV, and not to use cell phones, because you will get brain tumor
your mother tells you that you will get sick from drinking cold water
your parents have “goblene” on their walls, and “heklanje” (fine handmade lace) on every piece of their furniture, including the TV.
the time is divided into “before” and “after” the war
